Have A Family Home Evening

“We have a family home evening program once a week [Monday night] across the Church in which parents sit down with their children. They study the scriptures. They talk about family problems. They plan family activities and things of that kind. I don’t hesitate to say if every family in the world practiced that one thing, you’d see a very great difference in the solidarity of the families of the world.” ---Gordon B Hinckley

My family meets for FHE every Monday night. We try not to get too elaborate or it feels overwhelming. Here is a quick outline of what we do. We rotate who does what each week:

• Opening Song. Someone picks a song and we sing it together. It's usually a children's song from church or a hymn.
• Opening Prayer. Someone says an opening prayer asking Heavenly Father to help us have a nice time and that we will feel His Spirit.
• Family Business. We talk about what is coming up this week so we all know what's going on and who needs to be where.
• Lesson. Someone presents a short lesson on a gospel topic, or a particular value or virtue. It usually involves a story (maybe from the Friend magazine, or the scriptures) and is followed by questions related to the topic.
• Activity. This is something fun that we do together. Maybe a craft or a few rounds of I spy. Some weeks we just have an activity together like going to a movie or for a long walk.
• Closing Song.
• Closing Prayer. Remember to bless the refreshments!
• Refreshments. A simple treat.

Watch Your Step

This video is so powerful! Leave it to Elder Holland to say this right. He gets right to the heart of the reason I do this blog. It's the reason my kids are still begging for cell phones of their own, and I have not caved in. It's the reason I have passwords on the computers, Wii channels like Netflix, and my cell phone. It's the reason I worry over which friends my children choose. And it's the reason my husband and I do scripture study and still say individual prayers (yes, even with the 13 year old) with each of our kids at night: I don't want to see my children suffer because of bad choices.

Some may see me as paranoid or strict. I know that children need to learn how to be independent and how to take the consequences of their actions. Believe me, there are still plenty of choices they are allowed to make, and still plenty of consequences when they make poor ones. What I want to do is be sure that everyone in the family feels that home is a safe place. I want it to be as free of temptations as possible. That's why I do these things.

Because Heavenly Father is merciful and Jesus died for us, there is the chance to make things right even if we make a giant mistake. I'm so grateful for that! But how much better to not have the pain at all. Life comes with enough pain that's out of our control. So doing good is always best, even when it's hard or others are trying to persuade us otherwise.

For my kids: When you grow up there will be choices like this man had to make. In fact, there are choices like this that you have to make now at school or when I'm not around. Know that I love you and I am trying to help and steer you on a path of happiness. It may seem like pushing sometimes, but that's my job- to keep you on track. It is my responsibility to guide you and protect you so that you can have a full and happy life once you leave childhood behind. Please be patient with me as I try to help you. Some day it will pay off for all of us!

Journey to Fearless

Image by Castronova Designs

I watched Taylor Swift: Journey to Fearless with my daughters. It's a sort of documentary about Taylor's "Fearless" tour in 2010. It was great fun to see her personality and how she put the show together. She seems like a sweet girl who is still genuinely surprised by her success and enjoying sharing her songs and herself with the world.

We really liked seeing how she treats her fans so well: walking through the arena and giving out hugs and bracelets, holding a tea (T) party after each show for some big fans they find in the audience... Stuff that's just fun and personal.

As a mom I loved seeing the relationship "Mama Swift" (that's how she's known by all on the tour) has with her daughter. They seem to be happy spending time together and it's nice to see a daughter respect and love her mother so much. She even wrote her a beautiful song! (If you want to cry, or just feel warm and fuzzy watch The Best Day.) My favorite part of the series was in episode 2 when Mama told the dance choreographers that there were a few suggestive moves she didn't want in the show. She said she was thinking of moms covering their ten-year-olds' eyes during those parts. --Excited little claps for good moms!-- It made me wish I had been at one of her concerts with my girls. Not to mention how much I appreciate the lack of seductive undertones should I have brought my son. How wonderful to know that you put on an exciting, fun show without having to resort to calling up hormones. I hope Taylor is able to keep this attitude up as she grows older and does more performing.

I recommend Taylor Swift: Journey to Fearless as a great way to learn about how entertainment and music can be fun while still holding to high morals. Of course I wish she had sleeves on her shoulders and a few more inches on her skirt, but I'm willing to look at the big picture here. Taylor is a great example of loving yourself (we see that she was once a loner and seen as weird at school), others (be they friends, fans, or the tour crew), and your family!

Rating: Squeaky

Envy and Pickle Juice

This quote comes from an exceptional talk about envy by Jeffrey R Holland. He gave this in April 2012 General Conference. Another one of my favorite quotes from his talk is: 

"Envy requires us to suffer all good fortune that befalls everyone we know. What a bright prospect that is! Downing another quart of pickle juice every time anyone around you has a happy moment!"

When you put it that way, it sounds so obviously ridiculous to be bitter for others successes. I think "pickle juice" is going to be our family's new catch phrase for identifying jealousy and envy. 

Ok, and there's just one more that's really good too. I wish I could put this one on a banner at the kids' middle school!

"Coveting, pouting, or tearing others down does not elevate your standing. Nor does demeaning someone else improve your self image."

Pretty Hot

Inspired by this article by Pat Archbold, I created the image above. I agree with the general theme of what he says. It is true that the "pretty" (a calm, innocent beauty) of women has been replaced for the most part by the agitated gaunt look of  "hot."

And a hearty "Amen" to the part of the article about how disappointing it was to see Olivia Newton John's character in Grease throw away her prettiness to become hot and attract a guy. I have never understood why that movie was so popular for mothers to show their daughters. Maybe because the music is catchy?

I hope that my daughters will understand that when they live a good life it shows in their faces, and that is what makes them pretty. It's not the makeup, outfits, or hairdos that do it, beauty grows from the inside out.

That brings me to a favorite quote by my sister Erica: "It's more important to be nice, than pretty." Ooh, I need to make another artsy quote of that one.